you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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