Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
ok first of all what the fuck
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
