In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
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dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
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There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize