So drunk, too bad you don't want this
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
