He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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