i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
