Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
