what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
