Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
