Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

Whod you bang

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(313): Whod you bang http://tfl.nu/rw3i

Replies (7) Good night (2605) Bad night (826)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.

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(270): Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high. http://tfl.nu/tn40

Replies (18) Good night (8126) Bad night (641)
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(309): View more from Illinois

So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend

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(309): So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend http://tfl.nu/9ksw

Replies (34) Good night (3775) Bad night (553)
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(510): View more from California

I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college

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(510): I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college http://tfl.nu/imp1

Replies (22) Good night (1401) Bad night (5904)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.

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(+44): You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize. http://tfl.nu/htot

Replies (7) Good night (5265) Bad night (1224)
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(702): View more from Nevada

I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.

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(702): I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it. http://tfl.nu/kp90

Replies (8) Good night (1050) Bad night (4101)
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(975): View more from Missouri

At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.

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(975): At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt. http://tfl.nu/pzgf

Replies (5) Good night (2611) Bad night (659)
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(205): View more from Alabama

You fucked her?! HER?!

(1-205): View more from Alabama

She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.

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(205): You fucked her?! HER?! (1-205): She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir. http://tfl.nu/jld9

Replies (6) Good night (3573) Bad night (600)
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(407): View more from Florida

All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy

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(407): All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy http://tfl.nu/k1j3

Replies (4) Good night (840) Bad night (523)
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(914): View more from New York

I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.

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(914): I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm. http://tfl.nu/kbjg

Replies (13) Good night (1430) Bad night (667)
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(714): View more from California

I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.

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(714): I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart. http://tfl.nu/nyq8

Replies (10) Good night (796) Bad night (1296)
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(563): View more from Iowa

Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.

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(563): Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up. http://tfl.nu/xba5

Replies (0) Good night (343) Bad night (729)
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(302): View more from Delaware

Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.

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(302): Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells. http://tfl.nu/dzek

Replies (4) Good night (1071) Bad night (364)
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(619): View more from California

I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.

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(619): I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays. http://tfl.nu/ooc2

Replies (1) Good night (568) Bad night (182)
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(315): View more from New York

He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...

(1-315): View more from New York

Hahah. That's good.

(315): View more from New York

I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...

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(315): He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand... (1-315): Hahah. That's good. (315): I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out... http://tfl.nu/bifv

Replies (5) Good night (281) Bad night (447)

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