She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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