No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
