Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
