nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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