she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
