just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
