I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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