What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
