my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
