well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Randomize
