doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
