they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
