O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I don't think brook has ever known best
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize