he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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