I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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