and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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