are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
My breasts were aching with rage.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
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