i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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