This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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