I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
