Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
The uberlube is also flammable
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Randomize
