How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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