Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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