Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
