i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
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Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
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We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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