"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
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