So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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