**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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