sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
