How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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