Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
