I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
