yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
