God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
