Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
