Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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