and you said cock pushups were impossible
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
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Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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