Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Randomize
