no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
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Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
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Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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