hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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