I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
